Thing is.. now I'm 20 liao.. now taking driving lessons cos she forced me to.. i didnt want, cos i earn low pay (working aft grad from poly), no money to pay for car, road tax, COE, petrol etc etc.. den she said she will sponsor. so after so much bugging from her, i agreed, just to get her off my back. plus, she said SHE WILL SPONSOR. lying bugger. after she paid for my basic theory test (btt) fee, she said, 'since u working liao, u pay the rest'. wah say. she always promise things den retract the promise lei. fair anot? i'm now paying 80+ bucks PER LESSON for something i dont like. and i dont even have a car. so how? after get license, nv practice, den have license for what?

den when i was still in poly, she said, 'when u start working liao, i dun care how long u use internet, what time u wake up (on weekdays and weekends)'. den, now lei, i'm working le. den internet she still restrict sia. 11 pm want me off liao. den i come back from work only at 7. dinner and bathtime not included. and i wanna have time to check emails, chat with friends (msn) etc, cos my workdays usually suck. my office really sucks, and its not just me feeling this way. but forgetting about problems at work, home life really sucks. and this bites, cos home is usually the place i go to to relax. but now, i avoid home unless necessary. and its eating into my pocket. all the money on dinner, transport etc.. and not to mention, driving lessons.

how arh? that bugger doesnt listen to what i say, what i TRY to explain, den all my relatives side her, i'm always the bad guy. everything i say, they shoot me down. all the stuff about me being 'unfilial', 'rebellious', 'good-for-nothing', 'anti-social'. i mean, yea i may be some of that stuff some of the time, but only when im angry! and they make my angry side come out all the time. with friends i'm not as mean as with my relatives.

bth liao lei. i feel so let down by my own relatives.

i'm 20 liao.. den i still feel like 10 YO.. this morning i was slapped awake by her.. (slapped lor.. normally she just start yelling at me.. and either way i get a big fright..cos EARLY in the morning lei. ppl's brains still not awake yet den go and shock them lydat..) just cos i 'overslept' by 10min.. but actually i was already half-awake..just didnt feel like going to work..so lazed in bed for abit more.

jump out of the window loh

Your mother's a li'l overboard.

But then again..

20 tua sai ah?

Originally posted by Detached:

Your mother's a li'l overboard.

But then again..

20 tua sai ah?

what's "tua sai" ah? lol sorry eh. =S

"a lil overboard" is an understatement lor..a mother so violent, how she expect her kid to be 'unviolent'? (to her, at least) lol...for me i hit back if i get hit.. but otherwise i wont start to hit ppl de.. but she hit me first lei. first reaction is hit back right? den i kena scolding. =X boliao lah. its like, if someone start slashing u, just stand there let them slash ah?

Originally posted by L.lawliett79:

what's "tua sai" ah? lol sorry eh. =S

"a lil overboard" is an understatement lor..a mother so violent, how she expect her kid to be 'unviolent'? (to her, at least) lol...for me i hit back if i get hit.. but otherwise i wont start to hit ppl de.. but she hit me first lei. first reaction is hit back right? den i kena scolding. =X boliao lah. its like, if someone start slashing u, just stand there let them slash ah?

Tua sai = big deal.

Let me harshly put it across your face, she was rough to you so what? You're her kid. Not happy move out, not capable enough to move out then suck it up.

Respect for one's elders is character, you obviously are lacking.

then u should take 2B! tell her "u no sponsor now, i take cheaper license & risk my life!~"

20 still young la. haha. if u wanna be treated like adult... better behave responsibly like adult. u have to explain to her properly in a calm and mature way, that u feel stressed at work and tt's why u like to relax by just surfing net and chatting wif ur friends online. 

what u mean by "angry side"? if u get angry with her, it will jus make her more upset wif u. u must touch her heart instead.. and make her realise tt u have really grown up and is not her little boy anymore.

sometimes mothers find it hard to change their attitude towards their kids. but if u keep showing to her tt u can be a responsible and mature person, one day, very soon, she will realise tt u have grown up.

i find ur relatives quite kay poh. who are they to criticise u? does ur mum know abt this? if i were you, i would discuss this wif her calmly.

tell her tt u dun like it when relatives call u names... especially since u are her son... tell her it makes you feel sad tt she dun support u when ur relatives make these unjustified remarks at you.

u can tell her... u are still young, and ur career is just starting, so they shldn't call u "good for nothing". u may be hot tempered, but it doesn't mean u are "unfilial". sometimes u're tired and dun wanna socialise, but it doesn't mean u are "anti social".

explain to her tt the remarks are quite hurtful. how would they like it if u called their children "good for nothing"?

i believe if u explain to her the reasons for ur behaviour, the next time ur relatives criticise u again, she will support u and shut them up.

she's doing it for ur own good lah...

ur mother think now internet still using dial-up 30hrs per month limit ah??

Go get a seperate apartment.

u 20 liao stil so childish.

she's not a liar la. . .

zzzzz u 20 years old i 20 years old...

i got car and soon wife soon house =.= me see no problem with that

respect is earned not given. elderly people in general should be respected but when they are bonkers dont you think its our duty to put them in place ?

how to put them in place? soldering iron ah?

move out. Solves everything

where's your dad?

eh...xiao jie.

i just turned 19

now working, finished NS.

i take pay hor.

pay phone bills.

give household

save up for studies

save up for driving.

pay for my own insurance

U rather be in my shoes? im not blaming my parents, i am happy that im able to share their burden, driving my parents say half half, im already more than happy liaos. Studies, if i save up within 2 years, ill go get my diploma,

Its not the parents obligation to pay for so much things, but fairly speaking, your mum shd not have commit, but since has already happen, learn how 2 solve it. Cut down on your spending and stuff. Im spending not even half of my pay on my expenses. Or get a loan from a relative, and pay back via installments.

You are a adult already. solve the problems kay. All de best

Originally posted by Detached:

Tua sai = big deal.

Let me harshly put it across your face, she was rough to you so what? You're her kid. Not happy move out, not capable enough to move out then suck it up.

Respect for one's elders is character, you obviously are lacking.

respect is earned what. i dont respect anyone that is rough/mean/rude to me. i try talking to her liao, den her reaction is always 'NO?!' i really really hate her tone lor. cant talk to her, den how to respect her? she still got big boss attitude sia.

Originally posted by L.lawliett79:

respect is earned what. i dont respect anyone that is rough/mean/rude to me. i try talking to her liao, den her reaction is always 'NO?!' i really really hate her tone lor. cant talk to her, den how to respect her? she still got big boss attitude sia.

So earn it.

Originally posted by sinicker:

then u should take 2B! tell her "u no sponsor now, i take cheaper license & risk my life!~"

hahas! i wanted 2B! but she said cannot lor. hahaha. if can hor, this one i pay for it myself i dont mind. but now doing 3A, go so far liao (17th lesson ler)

no larhs, saying wanna 'risk my life'? abit childish sia XD later kena slapped

Originally posted by Detached:

So earn it.

aiyo.. u have my mum den u know how difficult it is..

Originally posted by cathykitty:

20 still young la. haha. if u wanna be treated like adult... better behave responsibly like adult. u have to explain to her properly in a calm and mature way, that u feel stressed at work and tt's why u like to relax by just surfing net and chatting wif ur friends online. 

what u mean by "angry side"? if u get angry with her, it will jus make her more upset wif u. u must touch her heart instead.. and make her realise tt u have really grown up and is not her little boy anymore.

sometimes mothers find it hard to change their attitude towards their kids. but if u keep showing to her tt u can be a responsible and mature person, one day, very soon, she will realise tt u have grown up.

i find ur relatives quite kay poh. who are they to criticise u? does ur mum know abt this? if i were you, i would discuss this wif her calmly.

tell her tt u dun like it when relatives call u names... especially since u are her son... tell her it makes you feel sad tt she dun support u when ur relatives make these unjustified remarks at you.

u can tell her... u are still young, and ur career is just starting, so they shldn't call u "good for nothing". u may be hot tempered, but it doesn't mean u are "unfilial". sometimes u're tired and dun wanna socialise, but it doesn't mean u are "anti social".

explain to her tt the remarks are quite hurtful. how would they like it if u called their children "good for nothing"?

i believe if u explain to her the reasons for ur behaviour, the next time ur relatives criticise u again, she will support u and shut them up.

i got tell her before.. den she said, okay, u can use. but do housework first. so i do. then, left like 30 min before 11pm. so i say, let me use until 12+. my friends want to talk to me online. and i got email to check. she say no. T_T everyday this cycle. so i bth liao, den i either do housework fast fast, or i come back later (like 9pm) cos i go out with the friends that i cant chat with online.

yah.. "angry side" means angry lor.. when i angry.. i know i say stupid things (cos she always jump to wrong conclusion, like 'why everyday use mp3/internet'. but thing is i nv use at all.. she just assume..all my relatives also like that. not fair larh, i nv use, den kena assumed that i use.. i say no, nobody believe me) so i just shut up.. listen to what person say.. but what i show on my face v hard to hide lor.. den she will like "why show angry face?" but i really angry.. den i tell my relatives to tell her on my behalf.. i angry but at least i shut up.. anger show on my face bo bian, but i try my v best to shut up ler. but i keep quiet also no good, say also no good, both way kena scolding lor.

my mum also call me names lar. she dun care de. she hurt me but i also no choice liao, just tahan it.

Originally posted by L.lawliett79:

aiyo.. u have my mum den u know how difficult it is..

You know what set the men apart from the boys?

Man, get shit, diam diam swallow, find a way out like a gentleman. Got character, got values, know what is respect.

Boys, kpkb. Period.

Originally posted by L.lawliett79:

u must ask her to be ur stead first, den have sex..

some girls (like guys) are just horny and will take anything available..

Oh yes, just thought I should quote TS for others to make more accurate criticisms.

The above quoted, was extracted, from the thread "When do you consider yourself attached?" in dating advice forum.